Recently, I discovered bloggers doing this "30 before 30" thing. Depressing: Some goals are so big that these girls seem so young. (Hint: the link at the end of this post sums up both me and why I feel this way.) I have half a month from this publish date (longer since I started) if I were to do this; for October 30th, if they're all new they'd have to be so tiny. I think I've accomplished about 4 "big" things in my life; that's 26 small or shallow things to list. Fascinating.
On the other hand, I'm probably overreacting and just bummed that it seems I cannot participate in the meme so "relevant to my life".
At least I AM NOT bummed about turning 30! (You don't scare me anymore!) Wow. Make that #5 huge thing. (Ah, ah, ah.)

Sure, I'm not married like I wanted and I'm not engaged. And I know we're not going to elope by October 29th.
But that's OK. I'm OK with that. I have my soul mate - that's what I truly meant I wanted in my heart. (Naiive me also thought crazy kids got all hitched all fast, so whatevs to her!) And there's nothing wrong with other scenarios for other people, either. That was my dream; my common, archaic dream - see, yes, I'm old.
So what's there to be afraid of? Being old? Oh my GOD, I'm proud of that! I will be so happy to actually be the decade inside of me. Sure, I'm a youthful, innocent goofball. But I'm also a crotchety fart. I've dressed halfway toward granny (in a good way) since I was somewhere around 24. I'm Coco, not Karl. I never partied or drank heavily. Never, ever, ever wanted to "sleep around" and I darn sure didn't want men who wanted that, either. I never appreciated the sterotype of wild 20-something.
"27" year-old (lying) Charlotte York got crabs, and I got insulted by those fabulous women more than once (well, I was a teen back then but that's almost worse). I'm really eager to join the "cool kids adults" club! (They have a little more insurance.)

Our twenties are supposed to be so great, eh? Well, some of mine were, but I won't miss my oily skin or 20-something "hotness" I was supposed to have. ****!!! I haven't had that "prime" body since I was 19! ****, my thirties could be that age! I probably have under 50 pounds to lose (goal is fuzzy) and now that I've found something to replace my soda habit, two pounds a week is more doable. (And my new doctor's a PITA, a really good PITA, so I can't get away with gaining weight, and I have to see the dude regularly.) A person can lose 100lbs in a year, maybe not I, but that leaves room for error.
Maybe I'll turn this into 35+ lbs down by 31!
And what if not?
Age isn't anything but a number!
...
And of course, there's always this: (Why I'll never be an adult a.k.a. Internet forever!!! ---Hyperbole and a Half)














Ella M.






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