*Warning: this post might be inspired by humbleness, and therefore doesn't sugarcoat my faults.*
So with my personal weaknesses it's likely a real killer that I still get paid when I don't -well- work --on the blogs. Sure I have to come back eventually, and I could make more if I updated like mad, but this fall I've felt very ill, so I just depended on getting by.
And even when better, after not blogging for a while, I face the oddest writer's block. Every. single. time.
And I haven't even been selling old bags on the bay like I should - it's just an upsetting/daunting thing to do, I guess.
But I decided to end my break from creating accessories and crafty/knitty goodies. And what started as "try out selling on Etsy.com again before gift-buying stops" turned into addiction and over-time-consuption just like that site tends to inspire.
Although somehow I haven't been all that "product"-ive with what's published on my new shop (Ella Mode Made @ Etsy). I'm a "terrible" perfectionist and it's been hard to get new photos up to my standard. That combined with the slowness of knitting and getting "start this new design project" fever (before finishing the current---the many current) - I'm not really making headway with "finished objects" either.
collage features a Flickr photo of a grey sky by Green Velvet.
depicts: actual grey FL skies, photography issues, sore knitter's
wrists, sewing machine annoyances, me adoring my online work,
lack of money and waiting for snail mail supplies.
Really even though I just had my 27th birthday and have been living on my own for a year, I'm far from being a grown up. I just ... well ... stink. At life? Le sigh.
But at least I have talents, and when I use them enough I have good work. Soon, maybe not soon enough, but soon I will have a stocked product catalog and regular blog entries. And money. Oh yeah........that green stuff, right? Heh.
It's pretty "stinky" that being disabled forces me to not work well for others, yet I can't even force myself to work enough, period. (It's like when in a class the teacher doesn't check homework.) And government help? It's not perfect, but I we have HOPE. And that inspires me.
Also I have about a week straight to be alone and work, because my BFF is away, and that combined with writing more about what else I'm involved with (I know I've said it before); mainly indie, will help this site be "stocked" with words. I might even add a few related features, but by now you know me and my lack of sticking to plans.
Or is that to say falling through on promises? I think I must start my new year resolution early, and that is to follow the mantra, "What would Barack do?"
You know, if he were only a slightly less awesome, design-y/writer chick. ;-)
*P.S. It didn't really fit into the article, but I also have my own domain/shop for Ella Mode at http://ellamo.de :-) .
Ella M.
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