Stylish with Substance

This is a quick announcement that I'm getting back into blogging after a death in my family. It's always so hard for me to get back in it...

Next is a great post that forced me, excitedly, to take off those rubber cleaning gloves and get back to typing. Cleaning? Yes, my boyfriend didn't travel with me, unfortunately, and boys alone at home make for messy houses. ;-)

That's my story and I'm stickin' to it. See you soon...

To not let Fashion define me, but to make my personal style show off my personal definitions. I will be well-rounded and above all, loveable.

Some new people in my life don't love the moi that is "Ella Mode", etc. That is a big part of me, but it is not me. Sure, these people should go shut up and mind their own businesses, but whatever their issues, these people are now permanant in my life. They can't see beyond this pretty (I say) part of me because they cannot understand this type of woman.

No apologies from me! I am a normal woman. I'm not the one with the problem.

However there are parts of me that I do want to bring as much to the forefront as my love for style, like my love for animals. Truthfully, the "Ella Mode" in me causes a few issues here and there in my romantic relationship, so I know I can't let my life revolve around these obsessions and addictions - the addiction is harmful to me personally and potentially both of us financially.

Even though right now, Geek Chic moi is sort of obsessed with simulation city games, but I've set it up to be a cheap hobby. One that takes focus from thinking about shopping, and gives me back some pleasure and reward I lack from not shopping. (You know human psychology and shopping!!!) I'm not even counting down the days 'til my next paycheck and I have my playing time spent in check too!

This is one of my interests change phases, just like my personal style goes through slight changes every few months. I'm trying to think of dressing less fancy sometimes, less designer or less... Hmmm. Arm crook handbag, all fabulista kind of thang? Yeah. I have a new classic COACH crossbody with vintage sensibilities, and I love that it looks laid back but does not shy from its COACH quality. (Oh and by the way, it was a $35 find at an antique mall - even though not vintage, what a score.)

I won't be someone who will swear off expensive bags, and I won't be someone who buys pleather handbags. Never should one apologize for hating on the pleather!! Fake-leather purses fall apart so fast, whereas the shoes seem to last just fine. Leather shoes are better and healthier for feet, but budget will dictate. And a girl, this girl?, needs more new shoes than new bags. Still, there's a moretorium on spending, especially with clothes, not so much with home goods and beauty supplies.

Now as for the shoes I will wear; I love heels.  They make me happy. No apologies here, why should there be? These are my feet, no one else's. And I take care of my feet. All shoes will have arch supports and Foot Petals. Some people just can't understand how comfortable heels can be made to feel!

Still I wear them too much in unsuitable places because I don't live a "heels" lifestyle. I vow to not wear heels to the grocery store or any long shopping trips, but I love all my cute shoes and need to use 'em. That said, I also vow to try to focus on slightly more sensible, chic sandals this summer. Mostly one go-to pair that is the best mix of chic with wearability.

Still, as usual. No sweats to the grocery store, etc. Don't worry, I could never be too casual a girl. Jeans and a basic tee? On my man, not me, give me a belt and some pizazz - but when I get home it's pajama time. There's even a song for it, but I digress. I always have "outfits" just like Carrie Bradshaw. However, when I'm sick enough, sweats to the drugstore, all the way - but only there and back. Don't like it? Someday, if I'm rich enough, it'll be "Armani" sweats or at least Juicy Couture. Do you like that better? I don't care, I'll be fluish, anyway!!

Bottom line, I will be me. Not a label. Not a slave. Not an image. Not someone else's idea of a woman, wife, etc. A complicated, imperfect, lovely person who always looks good, and never looks as fat as she really is naked, although I love myself naked too, and often looks a little bit taller than the height chart reads - just a little bit - because I love what I am.

So there. I just keep this vow to myself quietly and to the blog. To always be not only the girly-girl (last time I checked I am female, why not be girly) but the guy's girl I am to only those who know me best. I think love lasts healthier this way. Just watch 1990's Troop Beverly Hills for an example. There, you have fun homework. Now if you want to, you might be inspired to work on some aspect of yourself - but most importantly, live an "I'm not sorry" life!

OK I just had to share this possibly unrelated photo I edited... Below I fit it in to the theme, I think ... right?

Princesses are never satisfied...

Inspired by my Charlotte, who's passed onward.

And oh I needed to get some satisfaction! And I've got it. Mostly.

Now* we're putting our money into organizing/decorating our home, building up credit/paying off debt, and saving for a car down payment and then monthly car bills. And after those things are settled, maybe, just maybe, we can complete our family. (With a furbaby, in our case.) ... Currently dreaming of other (non clothes) things because buying shoes (like I did last week during a DSW Memorial Day sale), and then looking at the empty shoe boxes makes me want to fill my heart and cart with more shoes. Too addictive - trying not to look at fashions (that I don't already own, that I can always do, of course). ... Just trying to live my life for love right now, too! *(OK recently there was that horrible/wonderful thing of the COACH discount event, and more recently the completely horrible eBay economy continuing or else said event would cost $0. Le Sigh.)

The lost & found, something that tugs at everyone interested in anything that can be blogged about (everything, everyone). Therefore anyone could blog about it, right? Living smart is fabulous and crafting your life with cunning, well...

The truth is I'm currently passionate about honing the mind, well always that, but this morning it's about how to find a lost loved item. Whether they be sunglasses, key fob, or a craft tool - we are happier holding on to our belongings.

So it doesn't matter the topic, it matters more that I may help someone out there. I've just found my trusty jewelry pliers/cutters combo - wahoo. But you?

1. Go in steps and methods, pick whichever one you like first, but one thing that may help is to re-trace your steps. Unless borrowed by a roommate, you lost that item at some point in your recent life, so this can't hurt.
2. Use your hands. Not only should you move things (and clean!) but you should use your hands to feel behind (or clean) where something is blocking your vision.
3. Cleaning can be the culprit. Until there's the perfect place for everything, often where we tidy doesn't make a lick of sense to us later. Remember where you used objects and any place you might have placed afterward.
4. Relax, have patience (if afforded) and take a breather. Sleep on it or have some brain food. The next step is to rationally ... think.
5. Leave your mind open to unusual possibilities. Develop your cunning or wait for genius to strike. A good idea, which may turn into yureka and reuniting, may hit you.
6. Don't fail to or talk yourself out of looking where you've already looked (or someone else did for you). The next time, look harder, closer, smarter and handsier than before. And probably cleanier.
7. Lather, rinse and repeat if necessary. Don't knock that cleaning method.
8. "It's always in the last place you look" is both a misnomer and a dumb obvious truth. The truth behind the phrase is that if something is where we'd think to look first, second, and so on, we'd likely find it before even losing it. When it's lost, we have to look beyond & beyond the obvious and normal. Trust that eventually you'd find odder and odder places to look, if it weren't in that last (or recent) place.

Where was my missing object? In a random drawer where scissors go, not crafts. I'd tidied up - but I still need to find that thing's true place, clearly.

When I first told a friend I wanted to design fashion, she said it was as hard to be successful as it is to be a rockstar. Or that's basically what she said, 26 years of memories ago. I had thought there were levels (there are) but I was so gullible all through my youth (I hope not still!).

When I returned to that life dream with ever a-flamed passion in my early 20s, I heard the advice, "being a fashion designer is not as glamourous as you think it is." Did I think it was glamourous? All I really wanted from glamour is to be able to carry designer bags.

I attained that through a lot of blogging and a little (or a lot) of credit. Now that the credit is through with (he he) or rather I've rid myself of those naughty ways, is the same time I'm finishing the road to becoming exactly what I want. Learning, practicing, honing ... I've designed tons of bags through the years and have made many bags and accessories. Switched from knits to sewing to finally leather sewing and sourcing all the best and - well after testing the fun waters of Etsy and learning some business ropes - I've learned that starting a brand / real company takes a long time, even after all the initial prep.

As I take a break from this work to prepare for moving to a nearby city, I have time to write more again and reflect, too. What is the truth about being, and working as, a start-up - start-out - new and dues-paying designer? Is there any glamour?

Well let's break this down and see.

• Because of investing in a new business, if I want a new designer bag I have to make it. Meaning my brand is the designer - but oh this feels better than any other company's I can imagine, without any of the guilt from Hermès. I do still have all my old bags that I hadn't already sold through the years, and my wonderful BF won't let me sell any more - because he knows me all too well.
• It's hard work with the hands. I was not raised to do that kind of thing, but it's not heavy lifting, it's delicate craft. I don't mind the work, the more pain my back or fingers or whatever, the prouder I am. Sure someday I could have the funds or success to have bags manufactured or run a workshop of employees, but sewing at least for a long while in the beginning is definitely crucial unless someone's a socialite or something. And I learn so much with each gusset, etc. of a bag.
• My hands can get dirty even! I don't think I should have lotioned up that particular leather, which had ink bleed on hands, etc afterward, but I crave expirimenting, which is part of learning. Manicures? I hope someday!!
• I am sort of a kept-woman. Oh I shouldn't even say that!! :-x I have some luck in a wonderful partner who makes the bulk of the money that barely keeps us floating, and this life partner doesn't worry much - he often says, "I have no doubt they'll sell." (I still need to watch out for Future-MIL.) So while we struggle, I've somehow stumbled into that Cinderella story aspect I didn't quite want. I wanted to save myself, but this man is letting me do it - and teaching me about money. (Bad shopaholic, bad!)
• Something a bit more glamourous, too: We're moving into a bigger apartment. Sure The Boy needs to relocate to aid his work commute, but I'm the one with all the stuff and all the equipment/tools that require space. I'm getting my own loft studio with extra storage that should even be able to hold extra machines enough to switch thread less, etc. (That's like something called lean manufacturing by the way, read about that on The Fashion-Incubator.)
• Of course, until I'm booked-round-the-clock fulfilling orders, I should probably do that old Cinderella work and do some "housewife/maid" duty. Ugh.

Will my million dollar princess-life come? It would take a long time, but perhaps after I've had sales running for a year or so I should revisit this topic with a current-then list.

To sum up, little glamour but where else would I get it? And I don't need it, anyway! I do have the luxury of love - in whom I'm with and in what I do - or am building.