Stylish with Substance

Apparently, Diamonds are Paris Hilton's new Best Friend Forever.

But they appear to be just another frienemy, not doing her any justice.

Post this to your *don't board* and remember: keep it classy & less flashy.

And don't have multiple birthday parties a year (which number one is this?).

The socialite even manages to downgrade her Fendi baguette by association. Le Sigh.

I don't always enjoy cattiness toward the undeserving, unlike the cattiness that was pleaded for in my last post. But Gwenyth's ensemble here is so heinous of the subtle *But-I'm-wearing-all-designer* disgusting way that I find it amusing as one of the first posts to bring me to start upon the new life of Kiss Me, Stace. It's no new thing to rag on celeb unfab, and I haven't changed my mind about its propriety, yet I now want to write freely for a while to discover every little aspect of what Kiss Me, Stace will evolve into!

Besides, just look!

Let's start at the very tippy-toe bottom (and right above this text). Those shoes. They say "Givenchy gladiator pumps", I say "orthopedics meet torture." She looks like she has ankle braces atop strappy sandals. (Warning: this could happen to YOU, stiletto freaks.)

Then the dress, some think it's a fine frock, a vintage YSL. (I usually love them, but WHAT? Was this before their aesthetic actualization?) I see it as an oversized housecoat, or better yet, a fanschay yet still oversized medical gown -- to fit a theme. Please tell me Gwynny is nursing a new oddly-named baby rght now, 'cos you know I don't follow celebrity gossip too much to know myself.

Then there are those long, poofy sleeves, and some unfortunate effects coming from poor posture, an uneven hem and a hanging beltamajig. This vintage dress seems to be more *all I could find in a consignment shop* than a gift from the designer themselves. Sad. sad.

Someone get Ms. Paltrow a dose of style-sanity, STAT!

Another Spice Girl is getting into the clothing business, or so I hear. When I read the postings about Mel B's own new fashion line, I quickly checked the dates on each article - hoping for an April 1st on at least the original.

Key laughable and ridiculous points about Scary Spice's self-influenced venture: the clothing shapes and styles have no cohesion, originality or tie to current fashions, but they do have animal prints. And black. Every piece is flecked or flocked with cheetah or leopard, and somehow that makes this a marketable line? Never have I seen such a lack of work involved in a celebrity-backed business. I think it'll at least be somewhat more interesting to see what big biz types create for the name of Britney Spears.

The worst and most humorous aspect is the brand's name. There's no preparing you, so I'll just say it.

Catty Couture.

I think even Paris Hilton can do better than that. I mean, the take a word, add couture thing never had merit. Add in the naming to the unfortunateness of the style, and come on--how can this be anything but a cruel joke?